Hi, I’m Sam,
I am likely an over-thinker but so far it hasn't been in a
bad way at all, I think I should find another word to describe it but for now
let's use "over-thinker", if anything it helps me keep myself and my
interactions with people safe, direct, and moving. I always have intentions
behind everything I do, sometimes I may not be proud of the intentions but it’s
always honest and something I want to do and not what I'm being pushed into
doing in any way. At times the intentions behind my actions may not be entirely
very good, but it’s always honest and based on the information I have and what
I think is best at that particular time. I don't have a cheating bone in my
body, my actions may show that I want to put myself first but never to make
someone else feel bad or cheated but of course, I can only act a certain way no
matter what my intentions maybe but I can't choose how someone else reacts as a
result of my actions.
Just like any other
human in this world, my intentions can be influenced by someone else or
external forces. External influences can be good or bad depending on how much
influence you allow. The easiest way for my intentions to be influenced is by
advice or guidance, especially from someone whom I respect so much. I don't
know it all, and advice must not always come from someone who knows it all as
well, I believe advice can come from experiences, you're not advising someone
based on what you know but what you've experienced or what you've seen play out
in the past. Whenever I receive a piece of advice from a trusted person, I try
to consider it because I know it’s mostly coming from a place of love and
concern.
Intentionality is the
backbone of everything we do in life, be it career, love, or in everyday life,
Intentionality is always at the backbone which makes it very important to do
everything with the right intention. Intentionality brings purpose and clarity
into every action we take, it is all about being deliberate and mindful in
every action we take and it will always lead to what we hold dear as our
values. When you do things with the right intentions, you realize that every
decision no matter how insignificant it may seem will become meaningful, find
it easy and clear to attach purpose to everything little and big things you
expel your energy on.
I have gotten into
trouble before despite my good intentions while doing something for someone. I
have tried to figure out how that happened but I would surmise it to
miscommunication and misunderstanding. I won't lie, I had to take some time to
think about my dealings with people, I asked myself questions and wondered if
my good intentions really mattered and if I was incapable of relating them to
someone else and making them realize that I am acting on my best intentions and
not whatever they have convinced themselves is going on. Friendship/
relationships built on genuine intentions thrive on mutual respect, support,
and encouragement. The fact that I always tell myself that I have good
intentions in every situation and relationship I find myself in increases the
level of anxiety I have towards disagreements or arguments. I have managed to
somehow convince myself that arguments should not happen when I am engaging
with people with the purest of intentions. I have conditioned my mind to
believe that as true and repeatedly tell myself, that there should be no such
thing as disagreements or arguments if I am dealing with you purely, you should
believe me and I should also assume you're dealing with me with the purest of
intentions so I should believe you as well. My options when arguments or
disagreements happen is to run away or absorb it in a way that will never lead
to resentment towards the other person. As much as I hate getting involved in
disagreements, I also have a little space for disappointments, not
disappointment from what someone else does, but disappointment in myself that
despite my intentions, I still wasn't able to be on the same page as the other
person. That little space turns me into a sponge to absorb the situation in a
way that won't affect the friendship/ relationships.
At the risk of not
sounding like the larger population, I don't like surprises, I appreciate them
but I don't like them. As much as I don't like surprises, I don't like
surprising people either. I always want to know what is happening so I can act
accordingly. The chances I've had to surprise people haven't always gone as
planned and I don't need to ruin more moments to let it go. When it comes to
gifting, I'd rather ask you what you want and get it than assume and make
mistakes. For me to get to the point of liking surprises, I need to have 10/10
in every situation, if not, I’m going to let it go for good. For me, the truest
way to impress someone is to give them exactly what they want, most people try
to be polite when you gift them that they don't tell you exactly how they feel
towards the present and that is the decent thing to do but people would not
need to act “decent” when you hear them and know what they want in every moment
or season.
I always mean well,
even when it may not seem like it, I do and I know a lot of people mean well as
well. One of my many wishes is to always experience people in their truest
form.