Hi, I'm Sam,
I like to believe that for me life became easy and simple to live after i internalized the harsh truth that certain things will always be an everyday thing. This was a harsh truth because some of these things are not things that could be considered fun. Some of them could be considered fun for a while and then the reality hits that it's just for a while, then the fun starts to dry out little by little. People often misunderstand me when I say that one of my major irks in people is when they complain a lot about things that can be considered their reality for the time being. Some say that it means that I subscribe to the idea that people should suffer in silence but on the contrary, my stance is often that they shouldn't suffer at all or at least try to reduce the suffering in any way they can. For instance, someone in a terrible relationship but refuses to get out of It but constantly makes it everyone's problem by constantly complaining about it but seems to lack the will to do anything to change that which is the current reality.
There is loneliness that is really not talked about enough when it comes to a lifestyle that requires constant cosplaying in order to be accepted or thought to be someone different than your original self. This cosplaying isn't even about playing good when you're not good but more about trying not to be misunderstood by people who completely understand but are too disconnected with reality to showcase their understanding. In these situations, echoes sound louder than they really are, actions not imagined cut deeper than knives and ability to connect with people who are in tough situations that anyone can easily find themselves in without any provocation starts to feel like a personal ordeal. It is possible to create a bubble to try to exist in a different and lighter manner irrespective of how deep these realities might be but once in a while, reality tries it's best to creep in from an office pin hole that they find on some part of the bubble you've worked so hard to create and maintain and in that moment you begin to wonder if you're protecting yourself by living in that bubble or you're just trying to hide and pretend that certain things that happen isn't really happening because it's not part of the things you see and experience everyday.
The everyday day thing becomes a habit and a habit that you don't like but have to exhibit everyday tends to chip away at your core little by little. Some days you try to reflect and complain about it but you know that deep down, as much as you may not like it, you can't really do anything about it because you're doing whatever it is to survive your current reality.
I honestly think that the only way to face everyday things will be to completely accept things you can't change and work hard to change the things that you can change. An honest life will always be the best way to live. A life where you don't have to keep track of your ways in order not to he caught in a lie but to keep track in order to account for the things you've said and to repeat some of those things in confidence and in the presence of anyone. It's a difficult thing to trust people when there is lack of virtue and trust in oneself. When I find it difficult to find love in another person for me, I try to look within to confirm if I really have love for myself at the moment because someone else cannot enhance what I do not possess. Some people can be terrible and not give love to you even when you do have love for yourself but you have to realize that you're not looking for love within yourself for someone else to mirror but for self satisfaction thereby basking in your love for yourself and not relying completing on the love someone else can give because as the person can give, the person can as well take it back and you don't want to be found loveless when someone else decides to take their love away.
It's an everyday thing to show love, to work hard, to be genuine in the dealings with everyone. It's OK to not care so much about what people think of you but when certain people think of you, their convictions comes from what they know and have experienced about you and as such you can care about what people think of you especially when their thought have something to do with their interactions with you. No one supports a people pleaser but being authentic about yourself and dealing with people in the right manner sets the tone on how you please people. You will ruffle some feathers along the way but your job is never to straighten out ruffled feathers. Some of the ruffled feathers would've been needed to be ruffled for certain things to happen. With my growth came cautious discretion and sometimes when I think about it I wonder if it's really growth or the fact that I was the poster boy for Too Much Information (TMI). But while it may have been the combination of the two, I have gone through so much that I can confidently agree that significant growth has occurred and as uncomfortable as that process must have been, I am thankful for the everyday things that has led and will lead to higher levels of growth in and around me.
