THE IP MAG

Hi, I'm Sam ,  We have been conditioned to think from a Me perspective and that can really be the only way because we think from what we know when it's about us. We can only make assumptions when it's about someone else because even if they tell us, it might not be true and when it is true it might not be the whole truth and when it's the whole truth it might not make sense because in so many scenarios, their lived experiences makes the whole truth make sense which means that the fact we haven't lived their experiences, it does make sense that their whole truth doesn't make sense to anyone who is not them. The world has a way of toughening everyone up because no matter what we're going through, everything keeps moving at their individual pace. It's easy to think that because you're going through a lot, others aren't but you seem to forget that everyone just gets good as masking their reality just the same way you are. Because you can...

Hi, I'm Sam, I like to believe that for me life became easy and simple to live after i internalized the harsh truth that certain things will always be an everyday thing. This was a harsh truth because some of these things are not things that could be considered fun. Some of them could be considered fun for a while and then the reality hits that it's just for a while, then the fun starts to dry out little by little. People often misunderstand me when I say that one of my major irks in people is when they complain a lot about things that can be considered their reality for the time being. Some say that it means that I subscribe to the idea that people should suffer in silence but on the contrary, my stance is often that they shouldn't suffer at all or at least try to reduce the suffering in any way they can. For instance, someone in a terrible relationship but refuses to get out of It but constantly makes it everyone's problem by constantly complaining about i...

Hi, I'm Sam ,  Some say you can't shame the shameless, so sometimes I ask myself, are certain people shameless or they have just learned to be unusually honest about themselves and their situation. They don't admit those " shameful " things to be at the center of a pity party but it's their way of just saying what is instead of trying to paint things to not appear as they are. I also do not think that those who refuse to share certain things are being dishonest, I just cannot expect the same things from everybody. The shameless can also be seen as people who overshare and I can see them as people who are honest about their situation but it really depends on who is looking at it and what angle the person is watching from. I struggle to identify a mistake in anything I do with intentions irrespective of what side the intention falls. I know that calling certain things a mistake make a somewhat good defense but I have also tried my best to be honest a...

Hi, I'm Sam,  I think that at some point in life, it easy to identify things that work for you, things you can try out and things you don't even need to bother yourself about figuring out or trying to will it. It is possible that we find out these things very early and what category they fall under but we often times lie to ourselves maybe ignorantly or in a way to try to be adventurous to test and if possible push our limits. When I get an idea of a new thing either by reading it, watching it or even thinking it, I always try to call myself to order by reminding myself that experiences often differ irrespective of how identical I may try to replicate whatever it is. In every replication, there is always a mistake that either leads to a new design or a failed attempt which still further buttresses my point.  8 decades ago, a young Aunty Nneka, a beautiful young lady in some part of igbo land probably didn't have any future plans different from what she was used ...

Hi, I'm Sam,  One of the many ways I know that I truly love someone or group of people is my intense desire to share anything I have no matter the quantity with them. As much as sharing can be considered to be a selfish act, I like to see it as a bonding act because in the moment that you decide to give away some, if not all of what you have in your possession, you're saying a lot to the other person without using your words and you will very much be understood even though some might decide to misunderstand you but deep down they understand your intentions. I don't only show love by sharing physical things, it's deeper when I can share intangible things like my love, emotions, thoughts etc which creates a deeper connection because I am able to transfer something I cannot touch, taking it or duplicating it from within and doing my absolute best to give it to someone else without reducing the potency and to have the other person experience it in full, in addit...

Hi, I'm Sam ,  I took my time to sit down and I tried to figure out the natural state of humans and I honestly think that humility should be our default mode if you consider how often we recycle different things in our lives and I'm not referring to plastics or those kind of recyclables. We recycle feelings, opinions, materials, humans, love, hatred, positions, cars and so on. At every point in our lives, somethings that we will consider new, with all the happiness, appreciation and love has probably been used by someone else and we will place so much value on something or someone another person discarded and wants nothing to do with. And this realization has absolutely nothing to do with how I receive or appreciate anything that's comes to me, it doesn't help me decide how much value to place on it or the sentimental value. I have the absolutely freedom to attach as much or as little as I want to it depending on how I feel about it and not about who had it ...

Hi, I'm Sam,  I know that you know that I know that you know that I know that you know exactly how you feel when you have any sort of interaction with certain people in your life. There are people in our lives that we actually do not have much of a choice when it comes to interacting with them and all we can really do is to reduce how often we interact with them and there are exhausting people who we do not really need to interact with but for some reason we will interact with them, complain about the interaction, do nothing about cutting them off or removing ourselves from it, rinse repeat. It's possible that we took so much time trying to figure our exactly how we feel about the interaction but we have decided not to see it for exactly what it is because after the identification comes the thought to carry out an action if you eventually decide on what action to take in any of the scenarios.  Certain emotional situations require more strength than we would ever gi...

Hi, I'm Sam ,  I know everyone says this "I am my own competition " and everyone really should say it even when they don't believe it, say it as often as you can till you believe it. I wake up everyone morning and strive to make little decisions that will lead to the person and life I aspire to live in the nearest future. Sometimes the future is vivid enough to picture and sometimes I get greedy and try to belittle the imagination by telling myself that whatever it is that I can imagine is not scary enough because they say that our dreams should scare us but no one talks about how the scary dream can feel so far away and out of reach that I start to think that I'm not doing enough because the little things that I'm doing in the moment is no where close to what will help me achieve the scary ambitions. I've conditioned my mind to appreciate the ambitions that I can actually fit into my imaginations but also have it at the back of my mind they ar...

Hi, I'm Sam,  The year was 2021 and the month was January, right after everything that came with 2020 and with everything that happened that year, I like to focus on the fact that I got two Taylor Swift albums and no, it's not my way to downplay how terrible that year was or the irreplaceable loss people experienced but we get to choose what to focus on in any moment in time and I want to focus on that for now. Just like any other company, the company I worked for then made plans for the new year and making plans was one thing and taking action was a different ball game but my company decided that we needed to open a branch in another city which meant that some of us were going to have to move to this new city. I was pleased with this plan because it felt like a fresh start and it was a fresh start and it couldn't have come at a better time with the heaviness of the year before. I somehow convinced myself that things would be better and different because of the ...

Hi, I'm Sam,  I really do think that love has to be the warmest feeling to experience, especially because humans are the most selfish creatures and as such we tend to do things that make us feel good and caters to our likes, wants and needs that when someone decides to put their extremely loved self at a place and not only think of you but back it up with actions that probably has nothing to do with them but so much if not everything to do with you, yeah, that warm feeling is such a good feeling. Naturally, the easiest place to find love is at home, it's like a follow-come necessity that it is naturally expected but it's quite unfortunate that not everyone gets to experience love at home. For me when I think of home, I immediately feel loved, understood and backed up that I don't feel alone.  I asked one of my best friends what jazz I did to have and keep my friends so close and the way they come through for me makes me wonder if I truly deserve it and if I ...

Hi, I'm Sam,  One of my most celebrated skill by everyone around me is being a very good driver. I thought the joy I experienced when I started driving was going to be short lived but over 10 years later, I still get excited whenever I have to drive. My joy and pride in driving has made me the designated driver even when alcohol is not involved. People just get comfortable letting me drive because they get to completely relax and not try to step on the imaginary brake and turn the steering a little bit from the passenger's seat. I am very proud to say that I taught my two sisters how to drive and they can both attest to the fact that I not just a very good driver but also a very good teacher in that aspect. When I started teaching my immediate elder sister how to drive, I realized how much of a challenge it can be to learn something new. I encouraged her everyday but what she didn't know was I was equally challenging and encouraging myself because I started to l...

Hi, I'm Sam,   Most days I realize that my life is actually simpler than I would like to admit because I've lived a simple life for so long that I actually do not know how else to live and I don't let myself or my mind wander past where it really needs to. It doesn't go too far for me to now try to justify why I should think about certain things. Some days I pat myself on the back because I live a simple life and some days I wish for more because the simple can easily become boring. When I don't focus on taking credit for my simple life, I realize that I am simply paying attention to my interests and doing the things that truly matter to me no matter how simple and unserious those things may seem. There was a period I tried to live my life based on things I thought I was supposed to pay attention to and I truly regretted that period. Not only did I find myself waking up everyday feeling terrible, I couldn't recognize myself anymore. I struggled to do...

Hi, I'm Sam , They say there is no point crying over spilt milk. It is possible to take the sentence as face value but as a known overthinker, I've always had to dive deep into phrases like that. No matter our age bracket, after getting to the age of being on our own, our lives will be full of choices to make. Some choices birth unimaginable rewards while some come with their fair share of consequences which in turn lead to lessons learnt, but the annoying constant is finding yourself with options to choose from and not choosing any of the options is also making a choice which will probably come with its own consequences. Sometimes I feel like none of the available options will produce anything I think I desire in the moment but what I need and in that moment I just have to deal with the feeling of picking an option with a less terrible outcome.  Its very easy to identify bad judgement when you're not the one making it. When I listen to someone tell me about a s...

Hi, I'm Sam ,  A book starts with an alphabet or a character, drops of water make an ocean, a journey of a thousand miles begins with a step. These are the few ways I try to remind myself to take is easy on myself that the life I live everyday is made of building blocks of experiences. These experiences have not only been bad or good because I try to have a solid stand on life, I've had to go through the different types, shapes and duration of those experiences. I can trace certain things in the present to things that have happened in the past and things I've had to either learn or unlearn at some point in my little, boring life. Despite the number of times I've heard the phrase "its well" , it still somehow holds so much weight to me that it feels as new and weighty as it did the first time I heard it. And the irony that I often use it when things aren't going well or about to scatter into several pieces makes me chuckle most times. I've ...

Hi, I'm Sam,  One of my favorite things to do in this life is road tripping especially if I have to drive for the most part of the trip but as much as I love the idea and actually going on a road trip, I know the people to embark on such with and I also know the people that I don't mind using the last money in my account to book a flight for them in order to get the trip over with in no time. I love when someone is as excited about a road trip as much as I am, putting thoughts into playlist, snacks/ food, outfits, route. The excitement going to fill up the fuel tank because we know how long the journey is, making stops to buy things, relieve ourselves, buy things in traffic etc is a feeling I do not complain about at all. But unlike road trips, I've come to the point in life to experience the unavoidable, that there are indeed things in life that i will have to do and experience alone. And thinking about it, there are so many things in life we will have to do an...

Hi, I'm Sam,  I have always enjoyed doing things on my own and for myself because there's just something that the direct connection between myself and whatever that is does for my spirit. It easily brings things up to memory for me, that there's little to no need to always put things in place to serve as a reminder to remember something or someone. Having direct connection to something or people gives me a sense of individuality that requires no appreciation or loyalty to anything or anyone who isn't connected directly to what's at hand. When you introduce me to someone you know, maybe in a social setting, I begin to debate within me what side of me to showcase and how familiar should we get before and after we leave here? I often ask myself how necessary it is to include the mutual friend in our future connection, if any. Does excluding the mutual friend show any sign of betrayal or is it a way for me to form a genuine connection with an individual irr...

Hi, I'm Sam ,  It is very possible to live life knowing that nobody thinks of me as much as I think about myself. I am living my life and as such I have to be more concerned about me than anyone else, with this realization, I am able to extend grace to others when I don't feel so much like a priority to them, because they are living their lives as well and they should be more concerned about themselves. Everyone is the main character in their story and have to have that main character energy one way or the other in some areas of their lives if not all. I light up whenever someone takes out time to reach out to me to find out how I am doing. Immediately I see the text or the call, I instantly forget the last time we spoke or was in contact with this person, what matters the most to me in that moment is not make the connection genuine and deep so much that with few sentences or seconds on the phone we are able to fill whatever gap we think was existing from the last t...

Hi, I'm Sam ,  I drew the map of my life really early in life with zero understanding of what life really is. I had this eagerness to grow up so fast almost like i was desperate for it because I needed to start doing things contained in my map. While I was curious about doing these older things, I couldn't find the curiosity to map out my younger years, It didn't bother me what foundation the older me would build on, I didn’t bother to grasp how important the foundation was so I didn't care to map it out. Maybe I didn't feel my younger years were my responsibility as I was still under my parents and didn't have any choice but to do whatever they said so they should have the map, but thinking about it now, if I really thought they should have the map to how my teenage years should go,  why was I not curious enough to ask about it or desire to look at it because that should have some sort of influence on the map I was drawing up for my adult years. De...